A happy Hollywood family. Image: TCM

Against our better judgment, we watched the ultimate campy biopic: Mommie Dearest (1981).

This movie explores the troubled relationship between Classic Hollywood actress, Joan Crawford, and her daughter, Christina.

The film is based on Christina’s memoirs, and it is a pretty severe look at Crawford’s parenting techniques.

We want to go on the record by saying we’ve not read the book, nor have we read any discussions about it. We have no opinion on how accurate the film is in relation to the book or real life.

We did notice, though, in the movie, Christina is Saintly and Long-Suffering, while Crawford is Petty and Irrational, but maybe that’s how it really was.

However. Our goal today is to examine the movie and warn you away from it.

Uh oh. Busted for pretending to be Joan Crawford. Image: Scared Stiff Reviews

Let’s look at things about the movie that Work.

The sets, props, and wardrobe seem suitable to the era. The film takes place from 1938 to Joan’s death in 1977, and there’s nothing we saw that feels out of place. Some of the exteriors were filmed at Crawford’s actual homes in LA’s Holmby Hills and Bel Air, which gives the movie some Street Cred.

Biopic Joan’s makeup skews heavily towards her 1950’s battle-ready-thick-eyebrow-and-lipstick phase, but her hair is delightfully Spot On. Sometimes it seems Joan herself is on screen.

She’s portayed by the fabulous Faye Dunaway. Although we (yours truly) feel Dunaway has tremendous talent, we think too much of it is enforced here, e.g. “NO! WIRE! HANGERRRS!” But more of that later.

The pace of the movie is terrific. It never wallows, never stalls, never explains; it gallops straight into the next crisis.

When it’s done, you can hardly believe two hours has gone by.

The downfall of Faye Dunaway. Image: Tenor

But here’s the thing: Mommie Dearest ruined everyone’s reputation.

Christina Crawford’s hugely popular memoirs decimated Joan’s personae. No matter how hard Joan worked hard throughout her life to build her Brand, Christina’s memoirs blasted it to Kingdom Come.

The movie puts these memoirs in a slingshot and shoots them as far as they’ll go, with a predictably weird result. It’s almost as though the biopic is mocking itself while winking at the audience: “Let’s see how far we can push this.”

Unfortunately, this does Christina no favours. The difficulties she experienced growing up seem almost cartoonish on screen; no wonder she was unhappy with the movie.

Even Paramount, when they realized how audiences were reacting to Mommie Dearest, began marketing the film as a camp cult classic. (“Meet the biggest MOTHER of them all!”)

Then there’s the Oscar-winning director, Frank Perry, who received a Razzie for Worst Director.

Now, we’ve never directed a film, let alone a biopic of a Hollywood Legend, but it seems to us Perry might have used a firmer hand here. He let Dunaway Run Amok with her performance; indeed, in the Wire Hanger scene, you can’t help but laugh at the histrionics.

Which brings us to Ms. Dunaway herself, and the nosedive her career took after the release of this film. She continued to work, but was never again offered the meaty, prestigious roles that previously defined her career and garnered her an Oscar.

That is a shame, because Mommie Dearest could have been a thoughtful look at a turbulent mother-daughter relationship while navigating the rough waters of Hollywood and stardom.

Have you seen this film? What are your thoughts?

Mommie Dearest: starring Faye Dunaway, Diana Scarwid, Steve Forrest. Directed by Frank Perry. Written by Frank Yablans & Frank Perry. Paramount Pictures, 1981, Colour, 129 mins.

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Happily blogging about old movies and using the royal "We".

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